Moving to Montana
Well, I’m not going to lie, sitting down to write my first blog post feels like a pretty big moment. I’m the type of person who loves to journal and process my feelings on paper. I’m also the person that, some would say, may overshare at times. I do this because I believe the more we share, the more potential there is for meaningful connection. More often than not, people are grateful for transparency and appreciate seeing someone’s genuine self- all the real and raw emotions included. I hope that this blog as a whole can be a place where you come when you need a little boost, a little inspiration, some camaraderie and understanding. I hope that by sharing some of my experiences, you may find yourself between the lines- in the words and the sentiments shared here. I will tell you now, vulnerability is scary, and I definitely feel that - all the time. The fear of the world knowing my true self is terrifying, but also liberating. This dream has been burning for too long not to jump in, to finally say yes and to share it with whoever may decide to come along on the journey.
As some of you know, the last year of my life has been a roller coaster of massive change. To be honest, I think that’s what the last year has held for almost every human being that lived through it, just about anywhere in the world. In my case, working in adaptive recreation led me into teaching ESL online to Costa Rican students, which led me to multiple nanny jobs just to get by while working as a behavior tech in ABA therapy. The hustle and bustle of city life slowed a little during this time, yet the push to achieve, to make big money and to constantly be planning, moving or doing eventually ran me to the ground. I felt tired, frustrated and trapped in many ways. I felt stuck in a mindset of scarcity, never able to make enough - even when I had everything I needed. I felt trapped in the rat race of a constantly booked schedule, having to plan weeks in advance just to see my close friends. I finally had enough of the never ending hamster wheel, so I decided to pack up my things and move to Whitefish, Montana - to slow down for a season and spend some time thinking, dreaming and well...playing in the snow. I brought my skis, my camera, some warm coats… and that’s about it. I found a job working as a nanny for a family spending their final winter in the US in Whitefish before moving back to Melbourne, Australia. They quickly became a big part of my world and felt at times like family of my own.
Celebrating Willow’s first birthday with the Hudson family!
The kids and I adventured almost daily to visit the neighbor’s horses. Finn and Piper learned the names of each of the horses so they could call them to the fence by name to feed them little treats each day. We pretended to travel all over the world -most often to Australia - during our days together. We pretended to ski in the house, took the stuffed animals to the doctor for broken limbs and such, made play dough, did science experiments, tried our best to engage in zoom kindergarten and sometimes went a little stir crazy. We visited the parks to meet new little friends and even skied a few days together as well. I had the privilege of watching Finn, at age 5, participate in several GS ski races! What a champ.
Piper and Boomer (I think)…
Finn and Earthquake - the biggest mule in the valley
I worked three days a week and skied the others. I met some of the most incredibly selfless and caring individuals while volunteering for DREAM adaptive. I was pushed to become a better skier through weekly training with certified ski instructors which led me to my own certification. I have started to build community here and am already beginning to feel known and loved in this community. I feel hopeful for what is to come and am excited to launch my photography business and blog while in Whitefish!
Lake McDonald, Glacier National Park
Although today is a day of hope and excitement, I must say there have been many days filled with other, much more negative emotions. I will share more about those soon, so stay tuned, if that’s what you’re here for. But for now, I wanted to share an update, or an intro for those who don’t know me. I think it’s important to press into the good feelings as much and as often as we allow ourselves to sit in our discomfort. It’s crucial that we soak in the sun when it shines and allow ourselves to pass on the positive feelings and good vibes as often as we are able.
My dream with this blog is not to simply share my adventures and highs with you. My hope is that through this platform, we could build relationships, find common ground and recognize that we are not alone in this journey of life. People always tell me I have an amazing and exciting life - and I do! But, I also experience A LOT of big emotions, have hard days and find myself wondering what’s next ALL. THE. TIME. I don’t have a “career”, nor do I have a plan for my future career. Despite what it may look like, I don’t have things all together, but I’m starting to learn that it’s ok. I am setting goals and striving to care for myself, as well as for those around me, and am looking toward the future with excitement and anticipation rather than fear.
On a completely unrelated, yet crucial note, this month we have the privilege of celebrating Women’s History Month. I feel like it’s fitting to send a little shoutout to my ladies for always asking intentional questions, holding space to feel big emotion and for always inspiring me to be my best! I am so proud of your creative innovation and feel inspired by the passion you pour into your work and lives. Thank you for inspiring, dreaming, and loving so well. I am extremely thankful to be surrounded by so many incredible women, even in this season away from my home in the Northwest!
Cheers to the adventure!
XOXO Kenzie
